There are three special words everyone longs to hear in their life.
No matter who delivers these words, they make us feel warm, grateful, loved, excited and happy. Some lucky people hear these words every day from a partner, spouse, child, friend or parent. These words are like magic. They can stop a fight, reassure us, lift us up and provide the the security we are looking for in our relationships.
The words are “I love you.”
I don’t really believe in love at first sight unless it’s your newborn baby being placed in your arms. Some people can jump the gun on these three words too early in a relationship, but I’m not an expert and have no opinion on when it’s appropriate to use them.
I do have an opinion on three other words I despise. When I hear them spoken, the sound is like fingernails on a chalkboard. The first time I heard these three words, they were spoken to me by a stranger.
I was in a trail race in Vernon years ago. I had been on the mountain for a few hours and was starting to hit the wall. I was feeling exhausted and irritable and found myself quite fatigued. I hadn’t seen anyone ahead of me or behind me in a while, but I knew I was on the right trail as the neon flagging tape was marking the path.
I decided I needed to pull out the iPod out for some last-minute pick-me-up music. I was sure a little AC/DC could come to the rescue. Just then, I spotted a race volunteer strategically placed at a fork in the trail and he cheerfully encouraged me with those three words I will never forget: “You’re almost there!”
Wow! I’m almost there? That’s wonderful. Finally! I won’t be needing that iPod after all.
I had a sudden burst of energy and trotted happily around the corner, expecting to see the finish line. After about five more minutes, my trot became a plod. After 10 more minutes became 20 and then 30, I realized there was no music or finish-line announcements in the distance, I actually considered limping back to that volunteer and giving him a piece of my mind. His definition of “almost there” was completely different from mine.
What has this got to do with dating? I recently connected a match and told the woman she would hear from the man “shortly.” Five days later, she contacted me, letting me know she hadn’t heard from him. Apparently, my “shortly” differed from his “shortly.”
In another encounter, a man was organizing his first date with a lady via email. She said she would be available in 12 days — a time frame that sounded good to her, but not to him.
Just like a gym membership, a matchmaking membership takes dedication and effort. I think an appropriate time frame to email your match is within two days. A face-to-face meeting should definitely happen within the first week.
I know how lost and confused it feels to be wandering aimlessly, looking for the finish line, so if you haven’t arrived within a week, let me know and I will sign you up for a different race.
If you are single and happy and ready to put your dating shoes on, contact me by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. One lucky person will win a $50 gift certificate to Nandi’s Flavours of India.