When I was young and growing up in the Catholic Church, I remember going to my first confession.
I am sure all the other kids were as nervous as I was and probably told the very same stories to the priest: “I talked back to my parents” or ” I fought with my sister.”
Years later, while I don’t go through that specific procedure, I find there is something comforting and somewhat freeing about sitting down with another person and admitting parts of yourself that may be flawed and that you need to work on.
This surfaced for me when I had a unique profile from a woman who did something that impressed me. Not only did she send me her good qualities, she also sent me her weaknesses. I realized this was a gift — the ability to dig deep down and know the traits of your personalty that have caused you problems in past relationships, with family or even on the job. To me, a person who is able to admit vulnerabilities like this is way ahead of the game in securing future relationships.
When I started my job at Kamloops This Week, my sales manager asked me a question that caught me off guard. She asked me explain, in only one word, how my previous boss would describe me. This is such a good lesson in life, realizing how we see ourselves is not always how others see us.
Back to this lady’s profile. It occurred to me that we always hear people drawing attention to things about their physical selves they would like to change. For example, “I wish my hair was curly,” “I wish my hair was straight,” “I wish I were taller,” “I wish I was thinner,” “I don’t like my nose.”
This can go on and on.
But how often do we hear people say, “I wish I was more patient,” “I can be so stubborn sometimes,” “I am quick to anger,” “I judge easily.”
I certainly am not suggesting we pour out the worst of ourselves on the first date. But I am thinking that if we all became a bit more self-aware of what our weaknesses are, or what our part was in past failed relationships, then we may be able to learn from those lessons and bring the best of ourselves to the next partner.
By all means, if you feel like including a few of your pros and cons in your profile, I might be tempted to reveal the “word” I revealed to my sales manager on how my previous boss would describe me.
Then we can both do a couple of Hail Marys and be on our way.
If you are single, happy and looking, contact me by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. This week, we will draw for a $50 gift certificate to Save-On-Foods.