Now that the holidays are over, I am guessing many people were grilled
or interrogated by their family and relatives about their relationship
status while passing the stuffing and mashed potatoes.
Asking “Are you single?” is a completely acceptable inquiry. Placing a
“Why” in front of that query is nothing short of rude and judgmental.
Even though I’m a matchmaker and I love setting people up, I am also
the first to agree it is perfectly fine to be happy, single and not
looking. I can’t understand why some people think it’s any of their
business why someone has to explain their current relationship status.
It’s like someone who chooses not to have booze in their egg nog and
then has to endure 20 questions as to why. It’s not anyone’s business.
I find it odd to hear people judge others who are single, specifically
incredibly attractive singles, with the observation that “something
must be wrong with them.”
Let’s realize that maybe that person is single by choice, or is
reflecting and doing some soul-searching, or recovering from a
difficult relationship, or simply hasn’t yet found the perfect match.
No matter the reason, let’s remember we were all single at one point
and it’s not fair to assume something must be wrong with those who
choose to remain so.
I have certainly reached out to singles I know, to let them know about
my matchmaking business. If they tell me they are happy being single,
I applaud that. I just like to let those folks know I am here if they
change their mind.
I know single people who lead happy, fulfilling lives and are joyful
individuals. I also know people who have never been single longer than
two months and they continue to complain and can’t figure out why they
are so miserable.  There is also a misconception about being “alone’
and being “lonely.” Being alone with yourself is far better than being
lonely with someone. My mom is turning 80 in a few months and she has
been single since she was 53. I have never met a more gregarious,
active, busy, social, genuinely happy person than mom. She lives life
to the fullest.
If you are happy being single and anyone bugs you about it, you should
feel flattered as they are most likely envious.
There are so many songs we hear about relationships, heartbreak, loss
and infidelity. Did you know there are also a great number of songs
that celebrate being independent and single? You should download some
and own your single life with confidence.
The most important thing to find in 2018 is happiness. Then, if you
want to share that newfound joy with someone, I can help you find your
perfect match. As I look back on 2017, I have met many amazing, happy,
single men and women. I have several couples coming up on one and two
years together.
If you want to find a meaningful relationship, I would love to hear
from you by email at holmes@wheretheheartis.ca.
In the words of the late David Cassidy of the Partridge Family, “Come
on, get happy!”