The matchmaking world has been especially busy during the last couple of weeks.
Perhaps some singles are looking for their plus-one for their holiday office parties. Maybe they just find it easier to get into the Christmas spirit when they have someone to share it with. I had my two adult children over for dinner recently and they kindly asked me how I was doing with “this Cupid business.” I replied, “Really great, except one guy is ghosting me!”
My kids were mortified at my response and quickly informed me not to use that term as it implies I have been intimate with this man. This, of course, resulted in a heated debate about the trending phrase. I retired to my office (just so my kids know, “retired” can also be used to describe retreating or moving away, not just stopping your career) and looked up the definition “ghosting.”
“Ghosting: The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone the subject is dating. but no longer wishes to date. This is done in hopes that the ghostee will just ‘get the hint’ and leave the subject alone, as opposed to the subject simply telling them he/she is no longer interested. Ghosting is not specific to a certain gender and is closely related to the subject’s maturity and communication skills.  Many attempt to justify ghosting as a way to cease dating the ghostee without hurting their feelings.”
While ghosting does, for the most part, deal with the subject of dating, a friend can also be ghosted.  Research shows how devastating ghosting can be for many people. I absolutely expect any clients I am working with to dissolve a dating relationship respectfully, rather than by ignoring a person.
Having sold advertising for many years, I know what it feels like to be ghosted. It is not nice. Ask any salesperson  what they prefer — being ignored or rejected with a “No, thanks” — and I guarantee  they will pick the latter.
So, with this Christmas season upon us, let’s be sure the only ghosting we deal with are the Ghosts of the Christmas Past, Present, and Future.  Speaking of future, if you would like to share yours with someone, contact me via email atholmes@wheretheheartis.ca.
I promise not to Ghost you.