Do you happen to know a man in his mid-30s, standing 5-foot-9 with a thin build, weighing about 155 pounds, with wavy black hair, brown eyes and no facial hair? This is not a client I am prospecting for, but rather one of the people on an RCMP wanted list in B.C.

Sometimes when I read the Crime Stoppers description of criminals, I note they always seem to know their weight. How is that possible? It makes me want to show a photo of myself to the police just to see what weight they would guess.

(I am 139 pounds, by the way, five more pounds to get to my pre-COVID weight.) 

One thing almost every one of us has in common is that there is something about us we all would like to change. Some wish they were thinner, some wish they had more muscles and some want a different nose. People with curly hair want straight hair and those with straight hair want it to be curly.  It never ends. I suppose that is why the plastic surgery industry is worth billions of dollars.

That being said, there are so many people doing online dating and they are swiping left on potential matches simply because they feel the photo is not worthy of someone for whom they would be suited.

Fair enough because of course there has to be some attraction and, yes, some people put no effort into the photos they post online. However, I often wonder if the person looking for a match has unrealistic expectations of themselves and they may not realize that someone else could be judging their photo as being unworthy as well.

A really great way to find out what someone really thinks you look like is to imagine you are a finalist on a game show to win $1 million. All you have to do is tell someone on a plane who will be picking them up at the airport. The person on the plane has to find this person they have never seen before.  Therefore, you are going to be very specific in how you describe them. For example, if the person on the plane had to look for my first husband at the arrival gate, I would probably tell them to look for a taller man, about 5-foot-11 with a thin build. He has receding dark hair closely cut to his head, wears glasses, sports no facial hair, and looks really happy (because he is no longer married to me).

If the person was meeting my current husband, I would say they are looking for a muscular short guy, about 5-foot-7, with curly red hair, thick dark-rimmed glasses, a grey soul patch and probably not quite as happy as the first husband.  

Some men don’t want to be described as short and balding and women don’t want to be described as heavy. You could use words like pleasantly plump, stalky, big boned, but when push comes to shove and a million dollars is on the line, it comes down to describing what you really look like.

I have met some very sexy curvy and confident women who are absolute head-turners. Some people are athletic, some are really skinny and it’s just a matter of accepting our body shape and making the most of it. Of course, there is nothing people can do about their height and let’s hope that when people get to an unhealthy weight, or a weight where they don’t feel happy about themselves anymore, there IS something they can do about it.  

So, if you don’t want to hear a description of yourself, don’t play this game and definitely don’t commit a crime because they aren’t thinking about your feelings. They just want to catch you. The good thing with my service is I meet every person first and see what they look like, what their personality is like and am able to determine if they are someone you should meet.

If you are a happy single person who can write a pretty good description of yourself, contact me by email at holmes@wheretheheartis.ca and I will send you to the airport to pick someone up.